Dealing with Divorce During the Holidays
Posted on Nov 19, 2015 9:31am PST
The holiday season in America usually means two things to most people,
other than snow and festive decorations: giving and being with family.
You see it everywhere, from movies to television to greeting cards to
even the sides of coffee cups. What no one ever seems to address, though,
is how the holidays can feel worlds more complicated and stressful when
you are going through a
divorce. What are you supposed to do to keep everything peaceful and civil? The
answer might not be straightforward but these helpful bits of advice may help:
Don't wait until Spring: If you and your spouse know you are on the verge of divorce but want to
hold off until the holidays are over to begin it, you could be making
more trouble for yourselves than its worth. Waiting and bottling up your
true feelings can be disastrous and make you feel undue stress when you
should be feeling some form of relief. Better to be honest with one another
and file if that is what you want to do.
Family gatherings: Attending a traditional family event around the holidays is going to be
particularly tricky if you are going through a divorce. If your extended
family is quite large and you are comfortable with all of them, you both
may be able to attend without any complications. If gatherings are generally
quite small, you should talk to your spouse about who should be there
for which ones – maybe split events 50-50?
Dashing through the snow: Don't
literally dash through the snow – always drive carefully – but be prepared
to travel some distance if you are divorcing
and share children together.
Relocation can feel like a nuisance at first, especially when you want to see your
children during special events, but you are likely to find the added space
a luxury in the end.
Giving gifts: While it might be generous to give graciously to the ones you love during
the holidays, you might not be able to give all that you want to. Many
married couples share their finances – it makes sense and simplifies
things – but as a divorce is ongoing, it can look suspicious or
distasteful if you dip into your shared finances too much or too often
to buy gifts. Try to set some time aside to talk to your spouse about
what to buy this season and for whom to avoid surprise expenditures and battles.
Warmer Times Lie Ahead
Perhaps more important than any other advice we could give you is the reminder that you
will get through this troubling time. If you approach your divorce with the
help of a professional
family law attorney, ideally your divorce will be settled far before the next holiday
season, meaning you won't have to face with these same complications
again. Granted, there may be additional unforeseen troubles, such as both
you and your spouse giving the same gift to the same person, but those
problems will be nothing you can't handle, either.
Contact a Jacksonville divorce attorney from Hutchinson Law today if you need legal support while dissolving your
marriage. Whether your divorce is
uncontested, we can help guide you to an amicable solution that does not jeopardize
your wellbeing or your finances. Call
(904) 638-3134 or submit an
online case evaluation form today.